From Louise Wise

Saturday, 6 April 2019

Make your dialogue SHINE by Angela Rigley .@angierigley .@rararesources #timetravel #giveaway #prize



HOW TO WRITE GOOD DIALOGUE

by

Angela Rigley 




I find dialogue easier to write than narrative and I prefer to read it. When I come across pages of description or narrative in a book, I flick through, only taking in an occasional word or two to ensure I have not missed an action.



Even though research suggests the reader does not see the word ‘said’, I do, and purse my lips at lines of ‘he said’ and ‘she said’. In children’s books it is important to show the child who is speaking, but adults should be able to tell by the writing as shown in this example from my Victorian dual timeline novel ‘The Peacock Bottle’. Amelia has just met a local boy, Garnet, and her maid, Jenny, is showing her disapproval of him.



 “Scoundrel?” Amelia turned to Garnet. “You didn’t tell me you were a scoundrel.”

“Nor am I, dear lady. I’m no more a scoundrel than Jenny here.”

“So why did she say such a horrible thing?”

“Because, Miss Amelia,” butted in the maid, “he was once caught in possession of a stolen donkey.”

“A donkey? Why on heaven’s earth would you steal a donkey?”

“I didn’t steal it, Miss, I only borrowed it. The owner happened to notice its absence before I had chance to return it.”

“So why weren’t you sent to prison or, even worse, to that Australia place?”

“Because the owner happened to be my pa.” Jenny stood, hands on hips. “And he has a soft spot for Garnet. He wouldn’t have kicked up such a fuss if he’d known it were him who pinched it.”

“Borrowed it,” corrected Garnet.

“Well, anyway, Pa dropped all charges, and said he could have access to the wretched animal whenever he wanted.”



Even though I do not use ‘said’ it is obvious who is speaking.

In another scene from the book we can see how using ellipses can indicate hesitation. 



Ensconced in the drawing room, Daisy grinned as her mother’s mouth opened and closed as if eager to ask a certain question, but with qualms about doing so. She began, “Clara, my dear, are you…? I mean, is…?”

“You mean, where’s Wilfred?” Aunt Clara finished for her.

“Well, I did wonder. You did not mention him in your letter.”

“He… I… How can I put this? We need time apart. For him to come to his senses. I figured that if I left him on his own for a while he would realise what he was missing.”



I also use dialogue to convey facts, as in this extract when Amelia and her maid Jenny are walking though Cockermouth:



A statue stood in the middle of the road, and they stopped to examine it.

“Earl Mayo,” read Amelia. “I wonder who he was.”

“Someone to do with India. Apparently he was assassinated so they stuck that up for him.”



Short and concise. I did not want to turn it into a history lesson.



In normal speech we would say ‘Oh,’ ‘Um’ etc all the time, but such words used overmuch slow down the action, as does ‘Hello’ every time characters meet.

If a character has a lot to say I intersperse the speech with action, even if it is only ‘Daisy crossed the room’, or ‘Amelia took a sip of her drink’. Too little white space can spoil concentration.

As long as each character is given a different way of speaking the reader will identify with them and enjoy what they have to say.



One of the reviews for The Peacock Bottle said ‘The author did an excellent job differentiating the different timelines and the characters' voices, so much so that I did a double take back to the cover to ensure it wasn't penned by different authors.’



Praise indeed. 

The Peacock Bottle
by
Angela Rigley


In this Victorian dual timeline novel, Amelia Wise feels a jolt when she finds a blue perfume bottle in the overgrown garden of the house she has inherited. 

Several events in her life mirrors those from the past and, with the help of her newfound cousin, Olivia, the bottle's secret is uncovered.

Purchase Links:
Author Bio – Married to Don, I have 5 children and 9 grandchildren, I live in Derbyshire, England, and enjoy researching my family tree (having found ancestors as far back as 1465), reading, gardening, playing Scrabble, meals out and family gatherings. I am the treasurer of my writing club, Eastwood Writers’ Group, and I also write and record Thoughts for the Day for Radio Nottingham. At church I sing in the choir and am an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion, a reader, a flower arranger and a member of the fundraising team for Cafod, my favourite charity. I have written hymns, although I cannot read music.

Social Media Links –

Giveaway to Win 2 x Paperback copes of The Peacock Bottle (UK Only)
*Terms and Conditions –UK entries welcome.  Please enter using the Rafflecopter box below.  The winner will be selected at random via Rafflecopter from all valid entries and will be notified by Twitter and/or email. If no response is received within 7 days then Rachel’s Random Resources reserves the right to select an alternative winner. Open to all entrants aged 18 or over.  Any personal data given as part of the competition entry is used for this purpose only and will not be shared with third parties, with the exception of the winners’ information. This will passed to the giveaway organiser and used only for fulfilment of the prize, after which time Rachel’s Random Resources will delete the data.  I am not responsible for despatch or delivery of the prize.
OR if you don’t like html or are on WordPress




No comments:

Post a Comment

Featured post

If you like #syfy #alien #romance books check out this extract from EDEN

Excerpt from the book  Eden by Louise Wise Dizziness swamped her. Then sunlight fell on her in a burst of fresh, cold air as...