by
Clyo Beck
When you first conceived of your book, it
was so exciting. In the creative flow, you probably told yourself that you
would have no trouble getting it published because what was coming through was
so darned good. It would be a gift to
the world.
What you didn't tell yourself was that
editing and preparing it for publication would be easy. Or fun. Or cheap. You
didn't affirm that you would connect with the perfect publishing platform because
you weren't at all sure that you would. Neither did you jump up and down with
joy at the thought of marketing your book.
In fact, as you recall the process you went
through, you may realize that, at times, you felt almost apologetic about writing
a book. Sometimes you couldn't tell if your writing was brilliant or a bunch of
poop. Doubts about yourself and the value of your writing kicked in. Who were
you to be so audacious? Who were you to expect to be published? Who were you to
make money when so many other writers don't make a dime?
Yet, we're in an Indie revolution; so you
decided that you would self-publish. After all, who has time to deal with the endless
submissions and rejections associated with traditional publishing? Who wants to
play the Catch-22 game of "you must have an agent to get published, but
you must be published to get an agent." Besides, how hard could it be to publish
a book yourself?
With the desire to write so fervent within
your soul, you had no choice but to keep writing, and it was exhilarating. As
idea after idea came to you, and as the pieces of the puzzle that was your book
came together, you felt on fire. This had to be your higher guidance kicking
in, right? You had to be writing for an audience who really needed—and would
love—what you offered…right? Your book would just have to sell…right?
But then that inner doubter—the one
embedded in you when you were a little kid—started circling you, like a
vulture. While it couldn't stop the flow of inspiration coming through, it started
to sabotage you. The result is that you started to doubt yourself and
everything about your process. Then things started to snowball. You signed a contract
with a print-on-demand publisher before your book was finished. You found
yourself facing a deadline you had to meet or you'd forfeit your deposit.
As a result, you didn't have time to take
your chapters to a critique group or read through your book out loud. Tired of
trying to figure out whether your writing was good enough or not—and in a panic
to get your book up and just be done with it so you could try and recoup the
money you were investing in self-publishing—you decided you could do without a
professional edit.
After all, what could it hurt? You can
write, right? And, besides, these are your
words. Why do they have to be edited? Why can't they stand as you first wrote
them? Isn't that what will make your book unique? What can anyone else possibly
add to what has emerged from you? And how dare they think to subtract anything?
Besides, editors are too darn expensive.
So you rushed yourself into self-publishing
with a print-on-demand publisher. The bad news is that your book isn't selling.
So you feel sick, and like a failure. You don't even tell people you wrote a
book. You're afraid they'll read it and think less of you because, secretly,
you're afraid your book is junk and doesn't measure up, especially since you
discovered a couple of typos in it. Worse, you are afraid to try again. You are
afraid to write another book.
So, what's happening? Wasn't the Indie
movement supposed to empower you? Weren't you supposed to be earning your
living as an author by now? What's going on?
