HOW TO WRITE GOOD DIALOGUE
by
Angela Rigley
I find dialogue easier to write
than narrative and I prefer to read it. When I come across pages of description
or narrative in a book, I flick through, only taking in an occasional word or
two to ensure I have not missed an action.
Even though research suggests the
reader does not see the word ‘said’, I do, and purse my lips at lines of ‘he
said’ and ‘she said’. In children’s books it is important to show the child who
is speaking, but adults should be able to tell by the writing as shown in this
example from my Victorian dual timeline novel ‘The Peacock Bottle’. Amelia has
just met a local boy, Garnet, and her maid, Jenny, is showing her disapproval
of him.
“Scoundrel?” Amelia turned to Garnet.
“You didn’t tell me you were a scoundrel.”
“Nor am I, dear lady. I’m
no more a scoundrel than Jenny here.”
“So why did she say such
a horrible thing?”
“Because, Miss Amelia,”
butted in the maid, “he was once caught in possession of a stolen donkey.”
“A donkey? Why on
heaven’s earth would you steal a donkey?”
“I didn’t steal it, Miss,
I only borrowed it. The owner happened to notice its absence before I had
chance to return it.”
“So why weren’t you sent
to prison or, even worse, to that Australia place?”
“Because the owner
happened to be my pa.” Jenny stood, hands on hips. “And he has a soft spot for
Garnet. He wouldn’t have kicked up such a fuss if he’d known it were him who
pinched it.”
“Borrowed it,” corrected
Garnet.
“Well, anyway, Pa dropped
all charges, and said he could have access to the wretched animal whenever he
wanted.”
Even though I do not use ‘said’
it is obvious who is speaking.
In another scene from the book we
can see how using ellipses can indicate hesitation.
Ensconced in the drawing
room, Daisy grinned as her mother’s mouth opened and closed as if eager to ask
a certain question, but with qualms about doing so. She began, “Clara, my dear,
are you…? I mean, is…?”
“You mean, where’s
Wilfred?” Aunt Clara finished for her.
“Well, I did wonder. You
did not mention him in your letter.”
“He… I… How can I put
this? We need time apart. For him to come to his senses. I figured that if I
left him on his own for a while he would realise what he was missing.”
I also use dialogue to convey facts,
as in this extract when Amelia and her maid Jenny are walking though
Cockermouth:
A statue stood in the
middle of the road, and they stopped to examine it.
“Earl Mayo,” read Amelia.
“I wonder who he was.”
“Someone to do with India.
Apparently he was assassinated so they stuck that up for him.”
Short and concise. I did not want to
turn it into a history lesson.
In normal speech we would say ‘Oh,’
‘Um’ etc all the time, but such words used overmuch slow down the action, as
does ‘Hello’ every time characters meet.
If a character has a lot to say I
intersperse the speech with action, even if it is only ‘Daisy crossed the room’,
or ‘Amelia took a sip of her drink’. Too little white space can spoil
concentration.
As long as each character is given a
different way of speaking the reader will identify with them and enjoy what
they have to say.
One of the reviews for The Peacock
Bottle said ‘The author did an excellent
job differentiating the different timelines and the characters' voices, so much
so that I did a double take back to the cover to ensure it wasn't penned by
different authors.’
Praise indeed.
The Peacock
Bottle
by
Angela Rigley
In this Victorian
dual timeline novel, Amelia Wise feels a jolt when she finds a blue perfume
bottle in the overgrown garden of the house she has inherited.
Several events in
her life mirrors those from the past and, with the help of her newfound cousin,
Olivia, the bottle's secret is uncovered.
Purchase
Links:
Author Bio – Married to Don, I have 5 children and
9 grandchildren, I live in Derbyshire, England, and enjoy researching my family
tree (having found ancestors as far back as 1465), reading, gardening, playing
Scrabble, meals out and family gatherings. I am the treasurer of my writing
club, Eastwood Writers’ Group, and I also write and record Thoughts for the Day
for Radio Nottingham. At church I sing in the choir and am an Extraordinary
Minister of Holy Communion, a reader, a flower arranger and a member of the
fundraising team for Cafod, my favourite charity. I have written hymns,
although I cannot read music.
Social Media Links –
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