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Thursday, 19 July 2018

Giveaway Alert!!! Win a signed copies of The Second Cup by Sarah Marie Graye .@SarahMarieGraye #heartfelt #stories .@rararesources #sucide #tearjerking

Today, I’m taking part in the first anniversary blog blitz for The Second Cup by Sarah Marie Graye. I asked Sarah Marie to share the most heart-rending scene from her novel and she chose the scene where Abbie finds out she’s pregnant.

Scroll down for the giveaway!!

 The Second Cup
Sarah Marie Graye

Abbie had known there was something awry with her body the way only a pregnant person can. And it wasn’t just the swollen ankles, swollen abdomen and swollen breasts.

The tiredness and the backache that she’d put down to too many long days and too many late nights had reached the heights where they could no longer be ignored as symptoms of something bigger.

The pregnancy test was a mere formality: a wand to wave magician-like at Ebbs in a “look what we’ve made” kind of way. Except that she didn’t want to wave anything at Ebbs, except maybe a hand to shoo him away.

She had a little person growing inside of her and it was half Ebbs and she didn’t know if she wanted it. And until she knew, she wasn’t going to be able to tell him.

The secrets and the waiting and the decisions. They all became nothing when the pain came. It didn’t just rip her in two: she’d felt hung, drawn and quartered, her mind flitting back to history lessons at school, to the horrors of the centuries gone by where people who betrayed the crown were subject to a slow and humiliating torturous death.

Abbie felt like she was suffering a similar agonising fate, but all she could think of was the little person inside of her, that they were probably dying in her place.

Ebbs rushed her to A&E, knowing something was terribly wrong, but having no idea of the cause. At that point Ebbs simply cared about Abbie – and she realised she could have told him. But it’s too late for confessions, so she must speak in whispers with the hospital staff.

A positive pregnancy test confirms what she tells them in hushed tones. An ultrasound scan confirms the worst. Nothing in her uterus.

An explosion in her right fallopian tube. The worst type of ectopic pregnancy. A medical emergency. Abbie rushed into theatre, crying for herself, for her dead baby, for anything to make the pain go away. She cried out – the sounds began to form the name “Paul” – and she quietens herself with her fist in case Ebbs is near.

Later, after a straightforward laparoscopy, she was moved to the recovery ward, her ruptured fallopian tube removed. Her baby removed.

The part of her and Ebbs that she didn’t know if she wanted she now so desperately craved. She knew it was the hormones pulsating round her body, but that knowledge didn’t stop her womb from aching for the life that never was.

Later still, she was at home with Ebbs, the two of them coming to terms with the pregnancy neither of them supposedly knew about. He thinks it is easier that way: that they never got to know the idea of having a baby before it was taken away.  
She agreed, nodding, trying to hide the waves of grief for the baby she’d known about for three weeks. And along with that grief, she needed to come to terms with a diagnosis of pelvic inflammatory disease causing damage to her fallopian tubes. The reason her baby didn’t make it to her womb.

The potential damage it may have caused to her other fallopian tube. The problems she may face conceiving safely in the future.

She comforts herself with “at least” – the motto she has come to live her life by – that at least they didn’t have a Band-Aid baby. So Abbie knew she needed to be grateful alongside her grieving. To not be trapped by a baby like her mother was.

And then later still, none of it matters. Shortness of breath, followed by feeling faint, followed by yet more pain. Another hurried journey to A&E. Another visit to theatre. A nasty infection. Another tube removed.

Just isolated ovaries swimming around inside her, with no connection to her womb. No way to make babies – Band-Aid or not.

And then later still, Abbie and Ebbs are no longer together. The doctor checked Abbie’s scars and told her she had healed well. She looked down at her abdomen and agreed. Physically she had healed very well.

The little cream lines near her belly button sat in the natural folds of her skin and could easily be mistaken for chicken pox scars. Yes. Physically she had healed very well.

And then later still, came an extra glass of wine to ease the pain, to keep her company, an attempt to fill the hole. And then later still came Dominic. But the hole was too big for him to fill too.

Amazon book page    |  Amazon author page           

 The Second Cup

Would your life unravel if someone you knew committed suicide? Theirs did.

Faye knows her heart still belongs to her first love, Jack. She also knows he might have moved on, but when she decides to track him down, nothing prepares her for the news that he's taken his own life.

Faye is left wondering how to move forward - and whether or not Jack's best friend Ethan will let her down again. And the news of Jack's death ripples through the lives of her friends too.

Abbie finds herself questioning her marriage, and wondering if she was right to leave her first love behind. Poor Olivia is juggling her job and her boyfriend and trying to deal with a death of her own. And Jack's death has hit Beth the hardest, even though she never knew him.

Is Beth about to take her own life too?

Giveaway – Win 3 x Signed copies of The Second Cup by Sarah Marie Graye
(Open Internationally)

*Terms and Conditions –Worldwide entries welcome.  Please enter using the Rafflecopter box below.  The winner will be selected at random via Rafflecopter from all valid entries and will be notified by Twitter and/or email. If no response is received within 7 days then I reserve the right to select an alternative winner. Open to all entrants aged 18 or over.  Any personal data given as part of the competition entry is used for this purpose only and will not be shared with third parties, with the exception of the winners’ information. This will passed to the giveaway organiser and used only for fulfilment of the prize, after which time I will delete the data.  I am not responsible for despatch or delivery of the prize.

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Sarah Marie Graye was born in Manchester in 1975, to English Catholic parents. To the outside world Sarah Marie’s childhood followed a relatively typical Manchester upbringing, until aged nine, when she was diagnosed with depression.

It’s a diagnosis that has stayed with Sarah Marie over three decades, and something she believes has coloured every life decision, including the one to write a novel.

Sarah Marie wrote The Second Cup as part of an MA Creative Writing practice as research degree at London South Bank University – where she was the vice-chancellor’s scholarship holder.

Sarah Marie was diagnosed with ADHD in November 2017 and published an extended edition of The Second Cup in February 2018 that included character interviews so she could diagnose one of her characters with the same condition.

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